TWCL

[Wonderdrome]

Hello, everybody.

I've got this here comic Wonderdrome that I've been drawing for a few months, and I'd really like some feedback. I've been doing it in Inkscape. It's mostly non-serial, though there are a few recurring characters. Not all the time, but sometimes. OK, I'll stop spoiling all the surprises- go take a look!

Oh- I designed the website from scratch too, so tips and crits about it are appreciated too! Especially since I'm thinking of beefing it up a little around the time I get to 50 comics!

www.wonderdrome.com

Thank you! Blessings!

[smbhax.com]

It seems interesting--the layout and long vertical format has some "must scroll down farther" compulsion to it or something. Even if I can't say I understand much of the recent strips!
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[Wonderdrome]

Thanks for the response!

I've been experimenting, trying to pin down just how much of a situation I can leave out before it devolves into nonsense... I think especially the second-to-most-recent (lollipops) is a victim of those experiments. But ah well. You can't solve cancer if you don't break some eggs!

[Wonderdrome]

A new wonderdrome is up. Come on over and check it out.
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[antleonardi01]

I checked it out. I'm having a pretty hard time understanding the strips.

[antleonardi01]

I realized that my one sentence of feedback wasn't exactly very helpful so here we go:

I really appreciate how unique your strip is. I mean I haven't seen anything even close to it, well ever. I think there is a lot of uncovered potential for wonderdrome. The extremely long vertical format is very unique as well.

Things I would suggest for you to improve:

-The line quality is shaky at best. There are many programs out there that auto-smooth your ink lines. Personally I use adobe illustrator, but there are a ton of free ones out there even.

-Make sure the images you're drawing are a bit easier to follow. A lot of the time your strip gets a bit TOO crazy to the point where its hard to follow the events taking place.

-I would take out a pencil and draw some still life and stuff to improve your basic drawing skills. Draw everything fruit, ps3 controller, books, tables, chairs, you'll get a lot better at a pretty fast rate. Though my comic is extremely simple I spent years taking art classes and practicing my realistic digital paintings and stuff.

Keep at it!!! Never give up on your dream of being a cartoonist!

[raines80]

I think your drawing style is unique. I would suggest cleaning it up just a bit, but don't try an change your style completely. There are a lot of webcomics out there that rank in the top 10 of every webcomic list that have odd looking drawings, but they are all clean looking.

Your comics are odd and that isn't a bad thing. It is a very distinct style, but sometimes it can easy to get lost in the comic. It feels like you are trying to tell a 3 page story in 6 windows. I would suggest sitting down and story boarding your comics. Just put rough shapes down to get the layout right and then you can move on to the final strip from there.

[Wonderdrome]

Hey guys! I was away for a few days, but now I'm back, unwisely commenting on trolly threads (not talking about this one, thank god )

Thanks for the comments. Lord knows I don't want to go about defending my comic like some damn first-year creative writing student, but I'm very cerebral about how I approach my stuff so I want to talk about it. To that end:

@raines80: When you say to clean up the comic, are you talking about the shaky lines, same as anteleonardi01?

I had included the shaky lines intentionally- it's supposed to be part of the aesthetic... combining with the black void it's set in, the weird anatomy, and the occasionally way-too-self-conscious perspective and what's going on writing-wise it should make the stories feel like they come from a damaged place. But this doesn't seem to be coming across- maybe there's not enough to indicate authorial awareness of the damage. Any ideas on what could help communicate this?

When you guys talk about not understanding the comics, my guess is that you're talking about Voodoo Doll, or Lollipops, which seem to me to be the only really confusing ones out of recent strips (unless I'm totally out of touch with reality, which is likely. In this case, which ones did you find confusing? Were there any that you found lucid?)

All commentary is appreciated. Oh, also, for those of you who haven't yet, there's again a new comic up. Come on over, and check it out.

p.s. You're right, I do need to work on my basic drawing skills. I'm trying to make something that works with the skills I've got, but I think you'll see if you look at the earlier stuff I am improving some. Hopefully it'll only get better!
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[vaslittlecrow]

Wonderdrome: I'm Puerto Rican and I am a history/folk mythology and religion/science geek, so I was dying of laughter half the time. I think why people aren't getting some of the humor is because your humor is somewhat niche. I think if you explain to folks who your target audience and inspirations are in your about page, people might be able to connect a bit better. Author commentary underneath the comics might be a nice idea too for esoteric stuff that's not overly mainstream -- if you are trying to reach a mainstream audience. If you are not trying to reach the mainstream, remain mysterious. It's why I used to be a huge fan of Zippy.

I am glad I am not the only one who knows about Bimbo brand. They're awful cookies, but man, what a hilarious name.

I also saw you policing one of the threads for trolling (which oddly enough I was doing too) and I hope we didn't miscommunicate regarding one of the interactions we saw there. You seem like a good egg.

[Wonderdrome]

Thanks! I appreciate the criticisms but it's nice to hear from someone who it clicked with too.

Author commentary is a good idea. I have to figure out a way to implement it, but I think I'll definitely sink some time into that. I actually write alt text for each one, but because I'm- at best- a novice programmer it doesn't show up. Rewriting the About page is something I've considered before too, and will probably come on that big site redesign I'll do in 10 or so episodes.

And re: that thread- I think we were on the same page there. The only time I enter those kinds of conversations are to try to diffuse or clarify and I think you were making fair points.
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[vaslittlecrow]

If it helps at all, here's what I did for my about page:
http://barxotka.com/about/

If you want a really great example of an about page paired with a well-done FAQ, check these out:
http://webcomics.yaoi911.com/about/
http://webcomics.yaoi911.com/faq/

As for alt tag commentary, it really depends on the browser, but just putting alt="insert something here" on img src code, works for me. Personally, I put mine underneath the comic or on a separate blog.

I hope that helps!

[antleonardi01]

The new one is pretty funny... creepy ... but funny. Much easier to understand.

Here's some comic specific feedback: The covergirl one. I understand the joke you're going for, but the wording is awkward.

"Because prom won't abide by this."

You're trying to communicate a few things here:

1.) Makeup makes ugly girls pretty.

2.) She can't show up at a big public event because she has a demon growing in her forehead.

3.) Make fun of the covergirl ads we've all seen.

What if it said this at the bottom "Sometimes life's problems are more than skin deep." I honestly think that would make it quite a zinger.

[stevenboats]

Woah this comic is awesome, you have a great sense of humour. You getting many hits on your site?

[Wonderdrome]

@vaslittlecrow Thanks! I'll definitely reference those again once I'm working out my redesign.

@antleonardi01 Aw shit yes! This is what I'm talking about. I love lists. You've given me something to mull over, thank you!

@stevenboats Thanks so much! I'm really not! Usually around 1-10 hits a day, unless I'm advertising, which might boost it up to around 60. Spread the word!
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[antleonardi01]

Yeah man. I should take some of my own advice sometime, but this seems to help:

After you're done with your concept and joke, take a step back and just write down what you're trying to communicate. We're all guilty of not doing this. Things are much easily understood in our own minds, and the joke often doesn't survive the translation to the physical world (and into our strips.)

It's a lot easier to see whether or not you've successfully communicated the message when you break it down like this.

Anyway, you have a fan of wonderdrome here. Keep it up man and i expect the next one to make me laugh my ass off =)