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DeXsTeR



Joined: 25 Feb 2007
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 5:54 pm    Post subject: yeah... Reply with quote

ok, im new here and i recently made some sketches that soon became a comic.
i dont have a website yet...sooo...the only way u can check it out is if i upload them on imageshack sooo...here ya go!
page 1
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/5844/stripr3nn9.jpg
page 2
http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/6844/stripr4op6.jpg
page 3
http://img264.imageshack.us/img264/8741/stripr5zz8.jpg
and page 4
http://img404.imageshack.us/img404/7862/stripr6xi7.jpg

sorry there is no color, im currently working on that.
i hope you enjoy it, please leave comments Razz
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drs285



Joined: 24 Jun 2006
Posts: 48
Location: New Jersey

PostPosted: Sun Feb 25, 2007 7:12 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You need to zoom in, kill those big dead white expanses in your panels. (And lose the lined paper.)
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tbowl
Yarrrrr!


Joined: 06 Jan 2007
Posts: 1318

PostPosted: Wed Feb 28, 2007 5:27 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think it has promise, but slim down a tiny bit on the weirdness. All the gibberish is funny for a while but it gets old if you don't put some whit into it. Also try not to throw political stuff in there, turns some people off. Also heed the above poster. Also some scanners can kill the lines on lined paper for ya NP.
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DeXsTeR



Joined: 25 Feb 2007
Posts: 4

PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 8:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

ok dudes, thanks for the tips Very Happy
sorry about the weirdness aswell Laughing
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Traitorfish
Postpostpostpostpost!


Joined: 09 Oct 2005
Posts: 1942
Location: Scotland

PostPosted: Thu Mar 01, 2007 11:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The writing isn't terrible, but it's very forced- it really lacks the surreal weirdness you seem to be aiming for.
The art is fairly crude, and really needs work.
I'd say it has potential, but, at the moment, has quite a way to go.
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ElnJJ



Joined: 10 Oct 2006
Posts: 242
Location: Helsinki, Finland

PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2007 4:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You say you don't have a website yet: if you get one soon, go for something like DrunkDuck or Keenspace. Just a tip - they're designed to host online comics for free. Mr. Green

Your comic needs a lot of work, but, like Traitorfish said, there's potential, and if you're serious about it, sure, you'll improve over time. A few things you can fix up right off the cuff - DON'T draw on lined paper. It's a big no-no, in fact practically every parody of a bad webcomic I've seen devotes at least a little time to laughing at people who do exactly this. Get yourself a plain sketch pad. Smile Secondly, use speech bubbles rather than just typing words over your pictures - I expect, too, that this will be even more important once you start using colours - it may be possible to be experimental in this regard, but at beginner level, yah...speech bubbles. ^_______^ Also you seem to alternate between typing and handwriting your lettering - go for one or the other, it looks less clumsy and more polished. If you wanna stick with a type face, perhaps go for something more comical...there's a good list here: www.blambot.com Smile

Once that's sorted you've got your basics down. With regard to improving you art, life drawing never does any harm in learning to convey accurate anatomy, reading a diversity of other works, comics on the web and in print will also help, and assist you in deciding on a definite style. For the writing, I spotted the odd spelling mistake and grammatical error. To avoid such things in my comics, I usually script and spell check them in MS word, proofread them there, then proof read them again once they're on the page. Might be worth a try. Smile

Otherwise, yah, it's that whole 'practice makes perfect' adage. Good luck. Smile
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