TWCL

ps99 · Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 2:42 pm Post subject: Winger 3D

Winger is a parody of football strips in general and 3D ones in particular!
Heres the Intro....

Handsome, chisel-jawed Rick Jorvik was a superstar winger for Warrentry Rovers. Then disaster struck as he damaged his knee in a Koala-related incident.

Struggling to cope he looked around for a substitute to life as a Premiership superstar. Then Club Chairman Norbert Opencast ( 65 ) offered him a lifeline - Manager of Warrentry Rovers!

He wavered as he had a history with glamorous, pouting Anthea Opencast (34 ) but decided to take the job.

Any similarity to any well known 3D footie strip is purely coincidental! ( a-hem) Wink

I hope you enjoy it. I'm aiming for about one a week at the moment.

http://sites.google.com/site/winger3d/Home

JGray · Joined: 23 Aug 2008 Posts: 104

Its hard to judge with just one page, especially since you only have a single face so far. I'd like to see more. The concept's amusing, though.
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ps99 · Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 3:20 pm Post subject:

JGray wrote:

Its hard to judge with just one page, especially since you only have a single face so far. I'd like to see more. The concept's amusing, though.

Thank you, most appreciated Smile

I'm tweaking the character models and
am working on the next pages.

I'm hoping that posting it online will give me the incentive to turn out pages regularly.

dpat57 · Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 10:45 pm Post subject:

Some casual thoughts on your intro and first page:

Re Carson Scott CEO, maybe a smart business suit, shirt and tie are needed instead of a casual sweatshirt -- the little details that help paint the character.

The Singapore Airlines service recommendation sounded like product placement, are you being sponsored? Smile

Shouldn't the guy (PA?) who asks "How was your trip?" have said something else that prompts the "Excellent!" reply? The nameplate seemed a weak substitute for character shots.

"Now. What's happening with that football club I brought?" - typo aside, this seems like a weak way to intro the football club and Rick Jarvik into the story. I'm a-thinking you're relying too much on the background info intro ("Handsome, chisel-jawed Rick Jorvik was a superstar winger...") instead of showing this as the comic's opening sequence. But what's done is done, I guess. Tho' one easy way of supplying this info visually (er, stop reading now if you're not interested in suggestions) might be to show a bunch of newspapers with headlines like, "STRIKER ATTACKED BY KOALA" "CAREER OVER FOR ANIMAL LOVER JORVIK" "KOALA TRAGEDY FOR SPORTS HERO" etc. plus photographs of Rick. Followed by "JORVIK APPOINTED NEW MANAGER" "WARRENTRY ROVERS CHAIRMAN BRANDED IDIOT" etc. etc. More visual than the text-only blurb, is all I'm suggesting.

Feel free to ignore me. I'll check back to see how the comic develops.
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ps99 · Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2008 11:26 pm Post subject:

Hi, dpat57. I appreciate that you took the time to make suggestions and observations on the strip. That's partly why I'm posting here - to get feedback and hopefully improve as time goes on.

The first page was originally a one-off gag and contains some in-jokes relating to UK radio station TalkSport.
*The Singapore Airlines line was a reference to a presenter who used to chase "freebies" without any shame. I wish i was sponsored by them! Smile

* Carson Scott is an inversion of the England Third Goalkeeper Scot Carson

As regards the casual look , I could pretend the young CEO is travelling casual but I had time constraints and had to go with the model i had. Hopefully SC will acquire a suit - he can afford it!

The headlines idea is something that i might use in a flashback - thanks for the idea.

BTW - there's a Bonus story ( unfinished ) now posted on the site

Finally , how do you get the Banner Pic as a signature?

JGray · Joined: 23 Aug 2008 Posts: 104

Question. Is this American football or what the rest of the world call football (and we call soccer)? I assumed it was American but I think maybe I was wrong.
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ps99 · Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 12:00 am Post subject:

JGray wrote:

Question. Is this American football or what the rest of the world call football (and we call soccer)? I assumed it was American but I think maybe I was wrong.

It's Soccer - the game that David Beckham plays when he's not modelling underpants! Smile

dpat57 · Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 7:31 am Post subject:

[quote="ps99"]Finally , how do you get the Banner Pic as a signature?[/quote]
After you make up your banner pic... and are signed in here... select Edit Profile from the left margin menu.

There's a signature box:
[quote]Signature:
This is a block of text that can be added to posts you make. There is a 255 character limit[/quote]

Here's my sigpic code just for example's sake... it's one continuous line tho' it may appear broken. The URL of the website to visit is wrapped around the .jpg image that displays here:

[URL=http://www.freewebs.com/crowbarwebcomic/][img]http://www.freewebs.com/crowbarwebcomic/crowbar_h.jpg[/img][/URL]

What's the bet there's a much smarter way that only involves a couple of mouse clicks? Smile

Edited: used the Disable BBCode option, thanks for the tip. ...Hah, but the editing screws up the quotes because they're BBCode too! <slaps head> No worries.
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AskMeAboutOrcs · Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 9:27 am Post subject:

dpat57 wrote:

Note, I inserted 4 underline _ characters into the URL and img control tags to stop the message board from processing them and showing the banner, so you can read the code:

[_URL=http://www.freewebs.com/crowbarwebcomic/][_img]http://www.freewebs.com/crowbarwebcomic/crowbar_h.jpg[_/img][_/URL]

What's the bet there's a much smarter way that only involves a couple of mouse clicks? Smile

Before submitting your post, check the "Disable BBCode in this post" box. It's right above "attach signature".

ps99 · Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 2:14 pm Post subject:

Thanks!
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dpat57 · Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 3:09 pm Post subject:

I see your pic, but to link it to your site you'll need to use this:

[url=http://sites.google.com/site/winger3d/Home][img]http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c203/VENICEPICTURE/wingerlogo.jpg[/img][/url]
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ps99 · Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2008 11:51 pm Post subject:

dpat57 wrote:

I see your pic, but to link it to your site you'll need to use this:

All sorted - thanks for the tip Smile

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ps99 · Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2008 12:11 pm Post subject:

I had a think about the front page following dpat57s comments. Ended up rejigging it in a more visual way. Hopefully its a bit more of a punchy intro.
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dpat57 · Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2008 1:19 pm Post subject:

I confess I had a good laugh at some of the headlines, especially at Football707.com
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ps99 · Posted: Tue Sep 02, 2008 4:05 pm Post subject:

Thanks, dpat57. I've added another "web page" today. Now I just have to get this weeks Winger finished! Smile

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