TWCL

[uglytuesday]

I've been making comics for a year or so now, and finally feel that my latest attempt to break with my artistically dubious past, entitled X=2 is now ready to be sent out into the big wide world on its own. Currently it has an archive of just over twenty strips, so enough to sink your teeth into comfortably. Any feedback would be useful, but I'm particularly interested in criticism of shading and composition.

Take a gander: http://www.uglytuesday.com

[ichikawa]

Hi there -- just a first reaction: I think your strips are too wide. I have to scroll horizontally to read your comics, which is kind of annoying. Can you make them smaller, or break them into two rows of cells?

Jonathan

http://lumpofclay.jollyutter.net

[GlenGoldentree]

I didn't have a problem with the size of the comics, but then I use a wide format monitor.

I thought the comic was pretty good, actually. I am not a big fan of comics where the characters are aware that they are in a comic and are continuously referencing that fact, but it looks like you are phasing that out in your later strips anyway. The roommate thing is totally overdone in webcomics, but I think this one handles it better than most. It doesn't come across as totally cliched anyway.

You are mostly worried about shading and composition, so here are my thoughts. What shading? A black shirt and toned hair doesn't really count. Not that I mind that there is no shading. In fact, the simple art style works well, for the most part, without shading or color.

As for composition, you change up the angles quite a bit, zoom out and in, which is great and something more comics should do. There are a few imaginative touches, like the reflection of the flame thrower in the girl's face mask, also great. The art is consistant, giving the archive a nice flow. I only have two real complaints with the art. Firstly, it's very boxy. Everything is squared angles, from the couch to the bed and everything in between (except the characters of course). It kind of ruins the overall look of the art. You might try giving a few things some rounded edges to make it look a little more natural.

Secondly, many of the panels are very stark. No pictures or posters on walls, shoes tossed in corners, rugs on floors, etc. Just a few suggested details go a long way for making a comic look natural. Especially since this one pretty much takes place in one apartment, it would benefit you to toss in a few details here and there to make it feel more like these people's home. Other than that, you can fill white space with some shadow effects if you want to get more into shading. But obviously it's a balance betwen detail and output. Still, right now the art has a barren quality, and it's 90% the backgrounds that are the cause.

Anyway, overall a pretty good comic. You'll have a bitch of a time finding an audience, though.
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Pagan Comic - The Many Moons of Astra

[Cave]

GlenGoldentree wrote:

I didn't have a problem with the size of the comics, but then I use a wide format monitor.

I'm on a smaller monitor (maybe 14 or 15") and it didn't stretch for me either (though if my browser window were any smaller, it would have). Ichikawa, are you on a small monitor or something?

GlenGoldentree, very good review of the comic. I only read the first few, but I thought the jokes were actually pretty good.

As for composition, it was the second comic in the last panel. I thought that was very nice since the other panels and the first strip were all pretty much the same size and angle. Doing things like that will help a particular panel really stand out (which is more difficult when you're confined to one size panel and its a /square/ nonetheless). Keywords: pacing and hierarchy.

Also like what was said, shading might not be necessary, but you may want to try different line weights for emphasis and whatnot. Generally(not necessarily) things like wrinkles, hair, fine details will be in a thinner lineweight.

edit: Also, I just thought of this. Vertically, you may not be able to change the size of the panels, but horizontally you can do whatever you want so I highly suggest utilizing it. Can't fit a joke into 4 panels? Don't force it, try 3. Maybe even 1 or 2. 5 might be possible too.
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